Moving Out of My Mother's

Doctor Marion,

I moved in with my mother about 4 yrs ago and now feel I have to get on with my life.  My uncle is also living with us (mom and uncle been staying together 2 yrs to help each other out) and he is moving out end of June. I want to move out and have told my mom she should get a small bachelor apartment or apply to move in to a seniors apartment building, she can not pay for this place on her own. I give her notice but when it comes times for me to move she asks me to stay longer.  I reluctantly agree and stay...this has been going on for 2 yrs or more. What can I do to help her? My relationship with my boyfriend is suffering.

Sandy in North Carolina, 38

Elder care in any of all of its many forms is time and energy consuming. It can also be financially draining. The best time to discuss your life and your issues and how this is impacting you is NOW. Keep all the issues short, concise, realistic and pragmatic. Figure out what can be done and what cannot be done, and then it all a realistic time frame taking into consideration your needs and your mothers needs.

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